Talia takes a few steps in her walker

Tália has taken her first steps to independence - it is so great to see her able to start to move around on her own. This feeling of independence is like magic to her confidence. Take a look at this video. She is no longer strapped in to her walker and able to move it on her own. Looking back at the girl who could barely move, this video has given me great inspiration. Tália is such a cheeky girl with so much personality - she is now able to express herself better and her smile and good nature is infectious. She brings us so much happiness. Thank you to all you readers for sending her positive messages and prayers - I have no doubt that they alongside Tália's hard work with all her fantastic therapists have helped her to get this far.

A Carer's Identity

Who am I?

Whilst I love caring for my daughter and family, I recently feel as though I have been through a bit of an identity crisis. I share this with readers as I want this blog to truly reflect what we mum's, parents, carer's experience. I think that if we share our good and bad times, then others will not feel so alone.

And how can one feel alone if they are surrounded by so many? I told my husband the other day, 'I feel so alone' and his answer was but 'I am here with you, sitting in the same room'. He didn't quite see what I meant by alone.

Being a carer is rewarding, don't get me wrong but it can also sometimes alienate you. As my daughter's mum, I have a huge responsibility - it is my decision usually if we go for any medical treatment, my decision as to what she eats, sometimes this responsibility can be intense. Whilst there are often more than one person making a decision, ultimately, usually one guardian or parent makes that final choice. It has to be that way for as children have greater needs, the needs for finance are greater, the needs for bigger homes or adapted homes increases, the need for help increases, so basically you find that in a couple scenario, one parent tends to take on the carer role and the other the family provider role.

Because of this focus, as a carer, you can become lost in that world. You become your child's mum and carer. You adapt that role and sometimes instead of playing the role, you become it. In doing so carer's often feel lost - if they are carer, mother, helper - what are they? Sometimes people see you as that. They are suprised if you are out alone.

However whilst playing the role of a carer, one must not lose their identity. My focus has been so intense that I got a fright when I looked in the mirror the other day. I look different - bigger, duller, tired and haggard. It hit me then that this would not help my Tália. How could one be a good carer if they can't even care for themselves?

It dawned on me that I had kind of lost the real me. I know that many talk of the duality of a carer but I think it is important that carer's do regain their identity and try to get time out from time to time. Seek support from loved ones surrounding you - I reach out to my mum often. Be open and honest.

If you are friend to a carer - be it someone caring for a special needs child, cancer patient or elderly, sometimes a big hug and a simple, 'I understand how you feel' can help. Carer's also need to be cared for - they need to be acknowledged as individuals.

Physio is and should be fun

Tália loves her physio sessions. Ana Duarte has been a fantastic therapist for Tália. She has always encouraged us to integrate the concepts into everyday life. Tália is lucky to have such a loving team. In the mornings, she goes to nursery with Alicia, who works with her and is a physio, training under Ana Duarte.

Alicia, lovingly integrates Talia´s physio into her everyday activities. Simple activities like lining up and going into the gym or sitting on a potty etc. The last three months i have seen a real difference in Tália as physio has been integrated. At home we are trying to integrate it into play. Look how much fun Tália had in the park in the video below. In actual fact, her Dad discovered a way to work on Talia´s balance by using the climbing frame. Tália usually can only stand on her own for seconds at a time, yet this exercise forced her to hold her own.



I would really like to thank Ana Duarte and Alicia Martin Garcia for there support and for believing in Tália. They have encouraged us as parents to work with Tália and they continue to do it all with so much love.

I have just been thinking that this page needs up-dating. I have been so focused on ONYOM that I haven't given this page enough thought. I have missed blogging here as this is like a diary for me - a place where I record all of those special incidents and share my feelings.

Tália is doing well and crawled four steps forward for the first time ever yesterday. I am over-joyed. We all take moving for granted and just to see her able to move and grab toys makes be so happy.

I also wanted to share this video with you - mum has been doing yoga with Tália and she just loves it so much. Take a look.